Stuff I Think You Should Know

A quick snack

Hey, y'all, here's a couple thoughts I had while (accidentally) watching the Posterior-Smooching ofTribute to Terry McAuliffe on C-Span. I wasn't really paying attention, but it just seemed like there was quite a lot of unnecessary love being sent his way. So... I would like to join my, uh, fellow politically-charged people (read: all those flaming liberals that threw in their 2¢) in thanking the ex-DNC chairman, Mr. Terry McAuliffe.

Mr. McAuliffe, thank you, sir. Your tireless devotion to the American political landscape has done great wonders for the American people. Thanks to you, sir, the Democratic Party has become so insanely liberal that normal moderates (the swing voters) are so repulsed that they will never again consider voting Democrat. Thanks to you, for the last six Congressional elections the Democrats have lost ground in the House of Representatives and the Senate. I believe you worked with President Clinton on that one. And... most importantly... thanks to you, and the Presidential candidates your party has brought forward, the American people have TWICE elected George W. Bush. Well, I'm sure the main reason he's President is because he's the man, but you certainly helped!

So. Goodbye, Terry McAuliffe, and on behalf of grateful conservatives across America, thank you. To the new chairman, Mr. Dean: I have no doubt you will continue and even improve upon the legacy of Mr. McAuliffe. Who knows, with your leadership potential, the Democrats may even be able to attain the goal of reasonable people everywhere: that their party will land on the ash heap of history. YAAAAAAAAaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!

Thank you, and good night.